Scotch College

Re-valuing our children

A chaplain's lot can be a very happy one. It was a real buzz for me recently to visit the home of a Michael and Jacqui, whose wedding I conducted in the chapel two years ago. Michael ('82) telephoned to say they are now the very happy parents of a baby boy. Would I call, share their joy and pray for them as a family? I felt privileged and delighted. It is not too much to say that Harry has already changed his parent's perception of themselves, their purpose and their relationships.

Rob Moodie ('70) recently remarked on how his family taught him 'how to love and be loved'. He was reported (The Age, July 13, 2002) as deeply influenced by Steve Biddulph's book 'The Secret of Happy Children'. Biddulph believes 'men working more than 55 hours a week cannot be good fathers'. 'If only I could get down to 55 hours a week' Moodie thought. It influenced him enough to make a career move, work shorter hours, and have quantity time for those lessons in loving. 'I hope I will pass that on to my kids'

Rob Moodie's step is remarkable given today's subtle pressure to sacrifice all, including wife and family, for the sake of wealth and status.

Time pressures can play havoc with family relationships. So who can clearly see the value children and say unequivocally with the psalmist of Israel that they are a blessing? Our social environments have made it difficult to invest time in relationships. Fathering, mothering and teaching are all frequently under-valued.

In Counting for Nothing Marilyn Waring contends that while women's work fuels the economy of every country, it is not accounted. No value is placed on the labour of women. Economists (and she is one) are interested in production and define labour as activity that leads to surplus value. Waring argues that the re-production that derives from woman's labour, which is, typically, growing, and processing food, nurturing, educating and running a household, is not accounted in national economies. In the commercial world businesses are struggling to adjust to the concept of the triple bottom line; the recognition of not only a secure financial outcome, but also of the environmental and social outcomes of corporate activity.

The same pressures that take men from their families also work on women. Catherine Hakim has extensively studied the interface between women's un-accounted labour and their role in the work force (Sunday Age, July 28). In Work-lifestyle Choices in the 21st Century, she argues that 'once women are married and have children, "egalitarian idealism" quickly gives way to a preference for different roles for husband and wife'. This is so across social classes, educational levels, and racial/ethnic groupings, as well as age groups and income levels. Mr Howard's interest in Hakim's findings may well influence Australian public policy in the areas of maternity leave and home-care allowance.

All of this suggests some re-alignment of personal and corporate attitudes in favour of investing in relational and social capital.

The prophet must have sensed this important investment. Isaiah (11:1-9) saw a future time whose utterly unimaginable characteristic was that 'a little child would lead them'. Good news begins with the birth of a child. In an age in which much of human life was of little or no account, Jesus revalued those not counted, the enslaved and diseased and impoverished, the women and, not least, little children. He said 'Truly I tell you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will never enter it.' He took them up in his arms, laid his hands on them, and blessed them. God's kingdom is experienced when one trusts, child-like, in a parent-like God.

Rev Graham Bradbeer
Chaplain